God is amazing!

Originally posted on my myspace blog 10/28/07

Today, while in my Sunday school course (Faithful Families) with my Pastor, Brad, I was shown a new way of thinking of a verse that has had deep meaning to me:

2 Corinthians 12:9

Taken from www.biblegateway.com

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

In the past, I often thought about this in the sense that we find refuge in Christ/God, The Father. I viewed this as saying humans mostly turn to God when they are in need. God fills us and completes us as His creation. Therefore, as sinners, we are always made whole in God.Another way I thought of it was that, despite our singful nature, God made us as we are and we are His in this moment. We are His creation and therefore, we are what He wants us to be today, so we are "perfect" as He had made us.
Today, during class, I got a different understanding of this verse. I think a more spiritual and God-focused understanding; my older view was very ego-centric and human-focused. I realized that my view made me feel good, but it was not actually the point.The point is this -We cannot do great works.God can do great works.When God uses us for His purpose and will, performing great works through us, then that brings more glory to God because he took a "broken tool" and made it do great things!

WOW!

As I drove home, my radio station (KSBJ) was playing; there was a pastor on the air preaching... He was talking about how all the people in the Bible tell stories about being "broken tools", unworthy and yet, somehow God used these ordinary sinners to do extra-ordinary feats! These are stories of people who have sinned greatly against God and yet, God has loved them anyways. Not only has He loved them, but He chose them to do these great things in His name - WOW!
God's power is so complete that even my lacking, my own weakness is overcome with and by His love - PRAISE GOD!

Contentment

Philippians 4

4Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Thanks for Their Gifts 10I rejoice greatly in the Lord that at last you have renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you have been concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. 11I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13I can do everything through him who gives me strength.



They say: "Whenever God closes a door, somewhere He opens a window." I reckon this is the common language used to say that God provides.

When one faces times of trial and suffering, it is not because God has forsaken us. It is actual a time that God is preparing us; teaching us. As my good friend, Brenda said to me recently: "If we never had difficult times then we would not know how to recognize the blessings."

There is always hope. There is always grace.

PRAISE GOD!

Seek First the Kingdom of GOD

Seek first the kingdom of GOD!

Each day I struggle to be the best I can be. I think that the hardest part of living is to find the balance in life and in one's self.
It is difficult to live in the world and be a true servant to the Lord God.
Still, I think that our biggest flaw is that we seek happiness outside of ourselves (i.e. materialistic things or we expects others to make us feel happy and good). I think we forget we have a responsibility to create our own contentment by appreciating the balance we find in God. God brings us joy...
Each day is a lesson that will teach us about God and how we can connect with Him and His people. God is our balance. I think that if we seek Him first then all things will fall into place by His grace and love.

Philippians 4:11-12 (New International Version)

11I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.

There is an opportunity to grow in our faith and relationship with God each day. Sometimes the things that seem "bad" are really meant for good and they are preparing us.
Find your contentment... Trust in God and find your joy in serving Him!

PEACE!

Let Us Give THANKS

Originally posted on my myspace blog on 12/5/07

1 Chronicles 16:33-35
Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever.

Everyday is a blessing... Everyday is a moment to find growth, understanding, and to find our relationship with God, Our Father.
Each day is an opportunity for me to begin again... Every morning is a blessing in so many ways. It is a new day in which I can begin anew, thanks to the grace of my Lord. It is a new dawn to my life and a gift of my Father so I can learn and grow.
There are challenges with each day, but each day draws me closer to my God. Each day teaches me about His love, mercy, and grace. I am humbled by my God's love for me, the capacity of His forgiveness and the generosity of His grace.
Could I love with the patience and unconditionality by which my Creator loves me?
Could I offer the limitless, accepting forgiveness by which I am forgiven by my God?
Could I show the depth of grace that God gave me when He allowed His son to take my pain, shame and punishment?
I am awed by the understanding that not only did God send His son to deliver me from my sins, but He withstood watching His son in pain so that I would not have to suffer it myself.
As a mother, I know that I would rather die than to let my children suffer. God loved me (and you) because we are His children... He allowed Christ - part of Him, the Triune Father - to "die" so that we would not have to suffer.
To add to that, my Lord delivered me by taking on my punishment with a calm, accepting peace. With a single word, Christ could have ended His suffering on my behave, but He he loved me enough to take my sins and to stand where I would surely break.
As a mother, I could not bear to see my child in pain and I would endure whatever necessary to protect my children. Jesus - part of the Triune Father - loved us so much that He did not end His own unjust tortment because He wanted to protect us. We did not deserve it and to make it worse, we did not appreciate or recognize what was being done for us, and still... still our Lord loved us enough to protect us from ourselves.
I welcome each day to serve my God and Lord. Each day I fail and fall, but even as I stumble, I am not alone and I am loved. I am assured success as I know that I am already forgiven for the mistakes I am certain to make...
WOW - GOD IS GOOD!

Now, our God, we give you thanks, and praise your glorious name.
1 Chronicles 29:12-14

John 3:16
"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

A Bleeding Heart

Originally posted on my myspace blog on 12/13/07

Psalm 31

1 In you, O LORD, I have taken refuge;
let me never be put to shame;
deliver me in your righteousness.
2 Turn your ear to me,
come quickly to my rescue;
be my rock of refuge,
a strong fortress to save me.
3 Since you are my rock and my fortress,
for the sake of your name lead and guide me.
4 Free me from the trap that is set for me,
for you are my refuge.
5 Into your hands I commit my spirit;
redeem me, O LORD, the God of truth.
6 I hate those who cling to worthless idols;
I trust in the LORD.
7 I will be glad and rejoice in your love,
for you saw my affliction
and knew the anguish of my soul.
8 You have not handed me over to the enemy
but have set my feet in a spacious place.
9 Be merciful to me, O LORD, for I am in distress;
my eyes grow weak with sorrow,
my soul and my body with grief.
10 My life is consumed by anguish
and my years by groaning;
my strength fails because of my affliction,
and my bones grow weak.
11 Because of all my enemies,
I am the utter contempt of my neighbors;
I am a dread to my friends—
those who see me on the street flee from me.
12 I am forgotten by them as though I were dead;
I have become like broken pottery.
13 For I hear the slander of many;
there is terror on every side;
they conspire against me
and plot to take my life.
14 But I trust in you, O LORD;
I say, "You are my God."
15 My times are in your hands;
deliver me from my enemies
and from those who pursue me.
16 Let your face shine on your servant;
save me in your unfailing love.
17 Let me not be put to shame, O LORD,
for I have cried out to you;
but let the wicked be put to shame
and lie silent in the grave.
18 Let their lying lips be silenced,
for with pride and contempt
they speak arrogantly against the righteous.
19 How great is your goodness,
which you have stored up for those who fear you,
which you bestow in the sight of men
on those who take refuge in you.
20 In the shelter of your presence you hide them
from the intrigues of men;
in your dwelling you keep them safe
from accusing tongues.
21 Praise be to the LORD,
for he showed his wonderful love to me
when I was in a besieged city.
22 In my alarm I said,
"I am cut off from your sight!"
Yet you heard my cry for mercy
when I called to you for help.
23 Love the LORD, all his saints!
The LORD preserves the faithful,
but the proud he pays back in full.
24 Be strong and take heart,
all you who hope in the LORD.

My heart has been bleeding with tears for the last few days for those I care so much for. As my dearest friend face trials and suffering, I struggle with how to be there for them. I want to do or say something that will take away the pain and bring the joy back to their hearts. It hurts so much to see them in sorrow and I just want to protect them.
As I say these words, I realize that we are tested in life; we are given difficulties so that we can grow and learn. I should not want to take away an opportunity to allow my friends to find grace and become closer to God, as I know that Jesus said, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Still, I ache for my friends and I miss their smiles.
I eralize that the best way I can serve my friends is to pray for them and listen to them. I know that we find comfort in one another without words. My friends are not looking at me to fix things or to take away their pain; they are sharing with me and asking me to hold their hands as they face the darkness. I realize that friendship is a gift from GOD to give us a tangible means of knowing that we are never alone - God is always with us and He send helpers to comfort us and help us along our way:

Exodus 23:20 - God's Angel to Prepare the Way
20 "See, I am sending an angel ahead of you to guard you along the way and to bring you to the place I have prepared.

I am blessed in being able to be a helper - an angel - for my friends and to know that they are the same for me!

Praise GOD!

1 Peter 4:12-13 (New International Version)
12Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. 13But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.

Tension

Originally posted on my myspace blog 1/5/08
Modified 9/19/09

There are moments when you feel exhausted, fruatrated, anxious, depressed... just dark and alone.
The truth is that we are never alone.
There are always blessings around us and we can see them if we open our hearts to them... They are bits of light that shine in the simple things that grace our lives.
The laughter of our children.
The kind gesture of a friend.
The embrace of a loved one.
When the darkness presses in and the illusion of isolation entraps you, look past it and see the gifts that are there. Find the lights of joy and grace that fend off the dark and return you to the light.

Matthew 14:31
Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?"

I respect and appreciate my family & friends as they have been such a support. They remind me that God is in control and that I just need to relax, trust in God and spend more time in prayer. I am, but I struggle with the desire to have answers in MY time and wanting God to do things the way I want them done. That makes me feel like a bad person, a bad servant to God and a person of little faith.

2 Samuel 7:28
O Sovereign LORD, you are God! Your words are trustworthy, and you have promised these good things to your servant.

I think though of different verses I know and I realize that God is answering my prayers for strength and encouragement - through my friends and my family! I hear God and I appreciate that He talks to me through such amazing people whom I treasure!
I am really blessed even in tensions and even when I am not very strong in my faith... God is so good and I am so undeserving!!!!!!

Luke 17:10
So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, 'We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.' "

John 15:20
Remember the words I spoke to you: 'No servant is greater than his master.' If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also. If they obeyed my teaching, they will obey yours also.

Random Thoughts

Originally posted on my myspace blog 1/28/08

As I sit here today, I am intrigued by the rollar coaster that life can be.

You have UPS. You have DOWNS.

Sometimes you can see what is around the corner and othertimes... you cannot.
Sometimes you are going so slow that the anticipation is just too much to bear.
Other times, you are going fast that you feel disoriented and sick.
Some of us love the thrill of the ride and we want it to last forever. While others are not impressed and cannot wait to get off.

It is also interesting that there are so many variations and options for rollar coaster. This is also a mirror of life, I think.

How do you see it?

There are times that we rejoice. There are times that we despair. Still, each aspect to life, and the metaphorical rollar coaster, serves a purpose in creating the experiences of our lives. Each moment, as with every twist and turn, creates who we are, as they have created the track in which one rides. Whether or not our experience is a good one depends on our own outlook and how we want to interpret things. Do we see it as a dangerous, unpredictible, fearful machine or do we see it as an entertaining, delightful, surprising ride?

Life is truly a journey. Each day holds new possibilities and sometimes these are frightening and overwhelming, while at other times, it is calm and enjoyable. There are even times when that heart-pounding, thrilling scare ends up being a wonderous, exuberating giggle!

Be grateful for each moment you are on the ride and know that you are blessed!

PEACE!

Titus 3 (New International Version) -- www.biblegateway.com

3At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. 4But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, 5he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, 6whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, 7so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life.

Wonderful, Merciful God

Originally posted on my myspace blog on 2/6/08

Acts 7 (New International Version)
The Stoning of Stephen
59While they were stoning him, Stephen prayed, "Lord Jesus, receive my spirit." 60Then he fell on his knees and cried out, "Lord, do not hold this sin against them." When he had said this, he fell asleep.

Today I read from my Pastor Kerry's daily devotional. It was about Stephen and Acts 7. As I read the devotion I was struck by the way God gives us the words we need and the courage we seek in our troubles...

You always hear it be said that when you don't know what the say, the Holy Spirit will give you the words or if you don't know how to do something, the Holy Spirit will show you what's to be done. I think we rarely realize when these moments are upon us or the mercy that we find in them.

As I read this passage about the stoning of Stephen, I was moved by not only the forgiveness and mercy that Stephen showed to his persecutors, but I was awed by the mercy of God.

"When he had said this, he fell asleep."

WOW - can you imagine the pain that Stephen must have been feeling being stoned and the mercy in the act of God allowing him to "fall asleep"?

I think about this and realize that I have had these moments in my own life. An example that comes to my mind immediately is when I gave birth... I wanted to have natural childbirth so that I would not poision or endanger my children in anyway by accepting medications to help ease my pain. While I was in the midst of delivery and having incredible contractions, I prayed... and found mercy.
I was so tired and weary, yet God gave me strength to do what had to be done. God eased the suffering I felt and gave my heart peace and my spirit joy!!

When I was a little girl, I remember frequently looking in this old version Bible my mom had in her book collection in our basement. There was a picture in it with a hand (representing the hand of God) holding this mother and child; lifting them from the dangers around them. I remember how much peace that gave me and the hope that it filled me with! In my dark moments, I would recall this picture to my mind and thank God that He held me and protected me from the dangers that lay around me... What a wonderful, merciful GOD!

Another time I can recall that I was amazed by the trememdous mercy of God was when I had an accident where I fell of my bicycle and got the back of my head torn open by a railroad sign. Despite the situation, I was given mercy and did not have pain.
I was truly afraid of HOW I was going to die, though I was not afraid of death (as that is a rebirth into the Kingdom of Heaven), until that moment. In that moment I found a clarity that I lacked before. The clarity that God never foresakes or abandons us!!!
As I watched the fear in my family & friends' eyes, I felt no fear. I seemed to know that God was near and I was okay. I had the mercy of numbness in my wound, the love of those around me and the talents of the medical staff that cared for me. In that moment I knew that no matter how my death would be played out, I would not have to be afraid because God would be with me!!!

"When he had said this, he fell asleep."

I cannot help to think of when you smell something that is so overpowering that eventually the smell seems to disappear... To me, that is a simple way of expressing the amazing love and mercy God offers to each and every one of us!!!

May GOD bless you all!

Psalm 28:7
The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song.
Psalm 29:11
The LORD gives strength to his people; the LORD blesses his people with peace.
Ephesians 6:19
Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel

PEACE!

In the Blessing of Sharing

Originally posted on my myspace blog 4/7/08

1 Corinthians 9:9-11 (New International Version)

New International Version (NIV)

9For it is written in the Law of Moses: "Do not muzzle an ox while it is treading out the grain."^[a] Is it about oxen that God is concerned? 10Surely he says this for us, doesn’t he? Yes, this was written for us, because when the plowman plows and the thresher threshes, they ought to do so in the hope of sharing in the harvest. 11If we have sown spiritual seed among you, is it too much if we reap a material harvest from you?

It was a trying weekend in some ways. I came to a point in the end of the weekend where I was at a crossroads... In that moment, I had to take a leap of faith and trust in God.

At my crossroads, I had to decide whether or not I wanted to help someone. I had to decide whether or not I would put myself out there to help someone try to find a better path in life... and this would possibly jeopardize my relationship with this person. As I sat there, I thought about sleeping at night and what it meant to be a Christian. Looking at things from that point of view helped me to do what I knew was right, depsite my fears...

In facing some of the things I had to face, I had to think about what my motives were in doing what I was doing. I had to see how my actions were potentially viewed by others and to try to be as honest about things with myself as possible. This really helped me to realize some things about myself that were both good and perhaps a little unnerving, as well.

As I did some soul-searching, I questioned myself about why I felt so compelled to help this person and some of the others that I have been focussed with helping. In doing this, I was thinking about something my sister-in-law once said to me: She said that when she first met me, she didn’t think that I was really the person I presented myself to be. She said that people were not as nice and welcoming as I was and so it was hard for her to believe that I was sincere. As I looked at how people may interpret my actions and my reasons for wanting to help the children in my life and the people I care for, I thought about what my sister-in-law said and it made me feel incredibly sad.

Why do I do what I do? I do it because God said:
John 15:13 - Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.
Ephesians 4:32 - Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Proverbs 3:28 - Do not say to your neighbor, "Come back later; I’ll give it tomorrow"— when you now have it with you.

I am sincere in what I do and who I am. I may not be for everyone, but I certainly try to be as giving as I can. People have helped me and I want to help others when I am able to do so.

Why I want to help is because people have been answers to prayers in our life and I want to help by sharing my blessings. If we have so much, shouldn’t we share with those we care for who have less?

I think that I am realizing that I have a need to reach out and help someone. I think that I may be projecting this need outwardly in a non-constructive way??? I think that it has always been important to me to adopt a child so that they can have a family and I think that God is moving my family to a place where this is becoming more and more important to us as a family unit. I just worry if my/our need for extending our family is manifesting in an appropriate way? We seem to be bringing in stray animals and trying to better lives of the children we care for who may not have as much as we do... This is causing some people to be uncomfortable and fearful of our motives when the truth is that I think we just realize that we not only WANT to do more for someone, but we NEED to.

I think that we are being made ready for something and I just pray that God move us the way that serves Him best. I hope that as we grow in our faith and walk in our personal journey of understanding and self-discovery others will see our good intentions. I hope that others will see that we do not want cause ill feelings or sadness for anyone, but rather we want to share the goodness in our lives. So many have reached out and helped us when we were desolate and we just want to "pay it forward", but like my sister-in-paw explained before, most people are not like this and so it is hard for others to really grasp that we really mean no harm.

I pray that God guide my family and that He shows us how to move in the world to serve Him best and to not freak our friends and neighbors out! HEE HEE

Galatians 5: - The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself."
Romans 12:18 - If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

Funny Faith

Genesis 22 - Abraham Tested

1 Some time later God tested Abraham. He said to him, "Abraham!"
"Here I am," he replied.
2 Then God said, "Take your son, your only son, Isaac, whom you love, and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains I will tell you about."

Do you ever feel like God is testing you?
Do you ever feel confused by what the test asked is, or seems to be?
Do you ever wonder why things are happening in your life the way they are?

3 Early the next morning Abraham got up and saddled his donkey. He took with him two of his servants and his son Isaac. When he had cut enough wood for the burnt offering, he set out for the place God had told him about. 4 On the third day Abraham looked up and saw the place in the distance. 5 He said to his servants, "Stay here with the donkey while I and the boy go over there. We will worship and then we will come back to you."
6 Abraham took the wood for the burnt offering and placed it on his son Isaac, and he himself carried the fire and the knife. As the two of them went on together, 7 Isaac spoke up and said to his father Abraham, "Father?"
"Yes, my son?" Abraham replied.
"The fire and wood are here," Isaac said, "but where is the lamb for the burnt offering?"
8 Abraham answered, "God himself will provide the lamb for the burnt offering, my son." And the two of them went on together.

Do you still trust God in the moments you feel tested?
Do you question Him or do you question your own level of Faith in Him?
Do you let fear, dread, sadness or anger stop you from doing what you feel God is asking you to do?

9 When they reached the place God had told him about, Abraham built an altar there and arranged the wood on it. He bound his son Isaac and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood. 10 Then he reached out his hand and took the knife to slay his son. 11 But the angel of the LORD called out to him from heaven, "Abraham! Abraham!"
"Here I am," he replied.
12 "Do not lay a hand on the boy," he said. "Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son."
13 Abraham looked up and there in a thicket he saw a ram ^[a] caught by its horns. He went over and took the ram and sacrificed it as a burnt offering instead of his son. 14 So Abraham called that place The LORD Will Provide. And to this day it is said, "On the mountain of the LORD it will be provided."

Do you realize that God saves us and that even in our tests or trials, our Father is protecting us? Did you ever realize how God moves us (sometimes in the last minute) to keep us from danger?
Do you realize that God knows what is in our hearts and He will never ask anything of us that we cannot handle? Even when we think the test or trial in front of us is unbareable, God holds us along the way.
Do you realize that God never loses faith in us and that He wants us to realize that He will never abandon us? As the Casting Crowns song, EAST TO WEST states:

I can't live by what I feel
About the truth Your word reveals
I'm not holding on to You
But You're holding on to me
You're holding on to me

15 The angel of the LORD called to Abraham from heaven a second time 16 and said, "I swear by myself, declares the LORD, that because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son, 17 I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore. Your descendants will take possession of the cities of their enemies, 18 and through your offspring ^[b] all nations on earth will be blessed, because you have obeyed me."

Trust in God and know that He will never foresake you! BELIEVE! Keep Faith!!
Though things may seem confusing, frightening, difficult and/or trying, God holds you close to Him. God gives us angels to comfort us and help us along the way. God love us and knows that we want to be obedient and good. The reason that we go through the tests we do is because God is trying to help us to grow into the people we want to be for Him.
Don't give up - the things worth the most are always the hardest to achieve. Think of that while you walk in faith and feel the pains of growing into the servant God wants you to be!

PEACE!

To Be Loved

Genesis 5:24 (New International Version)
24 Enoch walked with God; then he was no more, because God took him away.

I aspire to be like Jesus...
The Lord is our savior and he is the model for what we should strive to be. I want to show the mercy, compassion, acceptance and love that Jesus did. I want to be that way to honor God, but also because changing the world starts with me. I want to be better so I can better the world by my participation in it.

My Pastor, Brad recently wrote (and then spoke about) "bad things" happening... He questioned why bad things happened to good people. He related it to the Buddist ideology of a river, saying that "without the rains where would the river be?" Brad said that bad things were like the rain and we were like the river; if we didn’t have bad things happen, we would never progress and grow like we should and could.

What does the "bad things" have to do with wanting to be like Jesus? Well, the important thing to know is that we are not perfect. We can never reach perfection. Jesus, however, was perfect... and he was also divine.
We will always fall short of our model, Jesus. More so, we have to realize that Jesus was shunned and tortured despite his perfection. Like the bible says:
(John 15:20) "Remember the words I spoke to you: ’No servant is greater than his master.’ If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also."

I want to be precious enough to GOD to be like Enoch...
I have always loved the story about Enoch. It is neither long nor concise. However, what it is is hope-filled!
The story of Enoch made me have hope that I could be in God’s favor. I don’t mean "favor" as in the sense of "good graces", but rather in the sense that Enoch was so loved by The Father that God did not want to be without him. God loved Enoch so much that He saved him from the experience of Death! How cool is that?

When I was a little girl, I feared death... Well, I feared "dying" - meaning "how" I would die opposed to actually being dead. I never questioned what would happen to me once I stopped being because I knew that Jesus had prepared a room for me in Heaven. I just feared the whole process of dying...
When I read the story of Enoch, as a girl, it made me feel relieved; I had hope that I didn’t have to face the act of dying, but that God may decide to favor me enough to simply "take me", like Enoch was.
Now that I am grown, I do not fear death nor dying. I trust in God and I know that He will not foresake me. However, I still want to be like Enoch in the sense that I want to please God so much that He wants to be with me; that He wants to be with me so much that He will just "take me" one day!

Philippians 3:12 (New International Version)
Pressing on Toward the Goal
12Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.

I am not able to be perfect... but I am loved as I am!

I am not able to do anything. I have to remember that I am instrument of God and that all things are done by Him; for Him. I live to honor God and though I am a sinner, falling short of perfection, I find peace in the grace that God gave me in Jesus!

How much more amazing is God when you realize that He does so much with such broken instruments? WOW!

2 Corinthians 12:9 (New International Version)
9But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

The Words Within

Originally posted on my myspace blog 7/1/08

I have really been struggling with things since my daughters went away on their vacation. I have learned things about my children, my family, my husband and mostly... myself.

Luke 9:25
What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self?

It is interesting to me that we hear more and see more when we are quiet and still. It is interesting to me how I am growing beyond the labels people have given me - I mean that I have moved past being what they want and I am coming more into my own. As I look at my daughters, I realize that I don't want them to compromise who they are and I don't want them to try to be what others tell them they are. I don't want them to have some need to fullfill someone else's prophesy for who they are or even to try to become some idea of what they think they should be. I want them to be exactly who they are, as God made them. Therefore, I want to be who I am so that they have my lead to encourage them and so I may not be a hypocrite.

Romans 6:6
For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin—

I am surprised at the people who have stood out in my life. I have really been surprised by the things that have upset me and the reasons behind why I am upset. It is easy for others to look in and think that they understand, but... they don't. People will see what they want to see and hear what they want to hear. They will pass judgement without facts and have answers without knowledge. All of us are guilty of this, unfortunately, but in the midst of this scrutiny are those who stand beside you and love you through it...

The Parable of the Good Samaritan
"A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he fell into the hands of robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead.
A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side.
So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side.
But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, took him to an inn and took care of him.
The next day he took out two silver coins and gave them to the innkeeper. 'Look after him,' he said, 'and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.'

The words that echo in my mind are actually from a song by the Jonas Brothers - yeah, I know - but it is really good and insightful:

Jonas Brothers
That's Just The Way We Roll lyrics

And I know
We get a little crazy
And I know
We get a little loud
And I know
We're never gonna fake it
We are wild
We are free
We are more than you think
So call us freaks

But that's just the way we roll

How do I see myself?

Genesis 4:9
Then the LORD said to Cain, "Where is your brother Abel?" "I don't know," he replied. "Am I my brother's keeper?"

Things are never quite what they seem. You will never really know all the elements to something unless you are actually the one experiencing the situation... We can think we understand something, but we could be totally off base. The funny thing is that I used to think I had to explain it to everyone so that they would understand why I was doing, saying or being as I was; I felt I needed to justify myself so that I could prove I had the right to my feelings. I don't think that I need to do that anymore. No one feels that they need to justify anything to me; No one feels they owe me anything... Why am I obligated to give to them what they are not giving back?

Leviticus 19:15
" 'Do not pervert justice; do not show partiality to the poor or favoritism to the great, but judge your neighbor fairly.

1 Samuel 24:12
May the LORD judge between you and me. And may the LORD avenge the wrongs you have done to me, but my hand will not touch you

Those who love me love me for who I am; they love me as I am. I don't have to explain or justify; they don't care because they love me for who and what I am in THIS moment. The ones who care for me will care for me without condition and they won't keep scores.

To those who love me.. I love you... - THANK YOU! You are my blessings!!!!

Romans 12:3
"For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you."

A Spirit of Strength

Sometimes I get locked in my own thoughts...
As a lover of history and, particularly, ancient civilizations (with a focus on Near Acient Middle Eastern cultures), I sometimes get into spiritual battles within myself. I get caught up in the thoughts I have and the feelings that accompany those thought relating to civilization and people, in general
I love historical fiction and that is the genre of literature I tend to lean towards. I love pre-American also, as I have a love for Native American culture and art. I think of the materials I have read and the intrigue they raise inside me and I often find myself confused with how the world evolved into what we know it to be today.

Matthew 6:24
"No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money.

How did we move to a place where materials and monetary values became more important to us than each other? When did life - whether human, animal or any other form - become less important to us than mineral or rocks?
All history shows humans to have an affinity for such things that they deem "valueable".

I am often reminded of the story I hear about how to catch a raccoon:
If you put a shiny objects into a container with a small hole, you can catch a raccoon. The hole will be big enough to allow the raccoon to put its hand into the container, but once it grabs the shiny object, the hand is then too big to withdraw from the container. As the raccoon will NEVER let go of the shiny object, you have effectively captured the raccoon.

I often think that humans are like this raccoon... for money and more - whatever that "shiny object" is to that person. The sad thing is that the "shiny object" is rarely the love for one another or God. We may claim that we are doing something for the love of humanity (or other life) or for God, but the truth often is that we do nothing unless we see a value in it... a value to ourselves.

Hebrews 13:5
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."

I even see this with our faith... or maybe I should say religion?
More people become religious because they think that they will get something from it. The choices made are not altruistic, but rather, they are measured and calculated with egotism.

I am often reminded of the story I hear about a guy who confessed to crimes after he saw the movie - Passion Of The Christ:
The guy went to see the movie. After watching the movie, he mistook the meaning of grace to be forgiveness through confession.
The guy confessed to crimes he had done because he thought that was the way he would enter into Heaven. He did not confess because he wanted to find redemption or because he had felt remorse. The reason he confessed was to gain entry into Heaven.

Why can't we live in peace and harmony?
Why can't we value things that are not pointless and see that what matters is the life amongst us? Why can't we stop being sleeping souls and begin to be real servants to God and true brethren in this world?

1 Peter 2:17
Show proper respect to everyone: Love the brotherhood of believers, fear God, honor the king.

Why do we have to perpetuate hate? Is it so bad to be different or to think differently than one another? Must we be so cruel?

1 Peter 3:4
Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight

Can't we embrace our differences the way we do the beauty of the colors in a sunset or the songs of birds? Can't we embrace one another and find peace the way other animals show us through their own examples?

Why must we be so hateful?
Often we have a different means to get to the ends, but we have the same goal. We are running the same race - life - and truly, we are on the same team.
We may be different kinds of flowers, but we are all in the same garden!
Why can't we work together and stop fighting against one another? Think of what we could accomplish if we placed value on one another opposed to things that are of no real consequence...

James 3:17
But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.

I pray we all can find the fruitfulness of faith in our lives. I pray that we can all be sincere with one another and truly find the love of life to get us past the emptiness of placing minerals and rocks before one another...

PEACE!